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Eternal Wings
Under Pressure
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Written by Anja Geenen
Chapter Four
Nobody asked him how he felt about his dad leaving them. He was only
a small boy and they didn't expect him to understand anything of what
was happening. Their aunt Julie had taken him and his brothers and
sister to her home so that his mother could get a bit of rest. Robert
wondered how she should get rest when she was worrying over his dad
all the time. What Robert did understand was that his parents had an
awful fight and that his daddy had left them. Nobody knew where he
went to or when he came back again. Robert was very angry with his
father and he felt sorry for his mom. He maybe was just a little boy,
but he wanted to do something, but what? The only thing he could do
now was taking care of his little brothers and little sister. What
Robert was really afraid of was that his parents would break up.
Although he was very angry with daddy, he also loved him and he
needed him. The only thing he and his brothers and sister wanted was
his attention and even that their father couldn't give them anymore.
He was so strange when he came back home from tour with Queen. Robert
had wished many times he had a normal daddy, one who played with him.
One who was at home when mom put diner on the table. Robert knew his
younger brother Michael had wished the same. But his daddy was famous
and playing the bass for a band called Queen. Even that was something
he wasn't very proud of. Other boys on school teased him with it.
Some of the boys only wanted to be friends with Robert because his
daddy was famous. It was all to confusing for Robert. Now his daddy
was gone, it was all more confusing then ever before. All he could do
was caring about his brothers and sister and wait till daddy was back
home.
* * *
It was a soft red evening when the phone rang, the woman picked it up.
There was a few moments silence, after that a man on the other side of
the line started talking. Soft, friendly conversation was made.
Then the conversation was over. The woman put the phone back in place.
She was contented.
* * *
Veronica had called Julie to tell John had called again. She told her
John was coming back home and she wanted to pick up the children as
soon as possible. Julie disagreed with that and offered to bring the
kids along with the reason she wanted to talk to her brother, ask him
what the hell he was thinking when he left. After a while Julie had
given the phone to Robert. Mommy said to him: `Hey honey, how are
you all? You're taking good care of the others? Aunt Julie takes you
home the day after tomorrow, then daddy is coming back home. We have
to go to the airport to pick daddy up, do you want to go with me? If
you're alright with it we're taking you, Mike, Josh and Laura with
us, okay? Mommy loves you!' Robert was excited, daddy was coming back
home. He ran to his brothers and sister to tell them, that he and
them and mommy would go to the airport the day after tomorrow to pick
daddy up. Yes, Robert was happy to know daddy was coming back home,
but his feelings were still mixed up. He was still mad with him that
he left, but he was happy daddy was coming home. He missed his daddy,
and he needs him. Now Robert could hardly wait to go to the airport.
There was excitement in the air. In the air of the Queen office.
Veronica had just called to tell them John had called to tell her he
was coming back home, the day after tomorrow. Everybody was happy to
hear he was alright and coming back. For Jim the worried feelings
were turning into angry feelings. Now he knew John was coming back
home he was wondering even more about why John left, but most of all
didn't contact them as soon he had left. Didn't he understand they
were worrying about him? Jim was already planning a speech he would
give to John. John was gonna answer and isn't to leave before he
answered all the questions. And then Jim would make him understand
and promise he will never ever do this again. But anyway, his
excitement of John coming back was great and he started calling
several people with who he was in contact during John's absence. Just
telling everybody John was coming back and not telling how glad he
was about it, though everybody could hear it he was glad. It showed
somehow how his relationship to the band was. Since the first time he
worked with Queen a nice and warm friendship had grown. Jim cared for
them and over them, somehow they were his children and he loved his
job. He didn't care about being a kind of a parent for them, he
actually enjoyed it. And he was concerned, as a parent was over his
children. He knew the band needed less guideness from him, but a
speech to John would be right and maybe to the others as well. This
can't happen again in the future, they didn't need this kind of panic
again. Jim would think of all ways to avoid such situations, he had
to think of all the possible solutions and he had to make it clear to
the band. It's gonna be okay, he thought, they will understand. The
last he called were the bandmembers, the first of them to hear the
good news was Roger.
No, not again about John, Roger had thought when he had picked up the
phone and heard Jim's voice. Jim said his hi and told Roger John was
coming back straight away. Finally better news, Roger thought. Okay,
now this was over and everything was okay. Roger went on with what he
was doing before he picked up the phone. It had to sink in and when
it did Roger must admit he was quite happy John was okay and coming
back home. The stupid git, Roger thought. He was going to tell John
he was a stupid git and that he never had to try this again because
Roger would break him. The whole situation was far from funny and
even Roger was very concerned from time to time. Roger couldn't
explain what he felt, it was a mixture of feelings. He felt the
anger, confusing and now the happiness. He wasn't sure if had to be
happy or angry, he was both. Roger tried hard not to think to much
about it. Not that he was a bastard without any feelings, no not at
all, it was just all to confusing for him. When he found out he
couldn't stop thinking about it, he tried to concentrate on the new
situation, John was coming back home and he was okay.
Brian was the second called by Jim. The first he said when he heard
the good news was, God thank! Brian still felt a bit guilty about
John leaving everything and everybody. He constantly had to think of
the fight he had with John near to the end of the Queen tour. Brian
had known the pressure was very high on John and surely the fight
hadn't really helped John. Brian wished that he hadn't said certain
things, he had said really bad things to John and Brian felt very bad
about it. As soon he got to talk to John he would tell him he was
sorry. But in the other hand, John had said a few things Brian really
disliked. Brian promised himself he would make John apologise for it.
And the fact John had left so sudden was another reason to be angry
with him. It had caused Brian a few sleepless nights. Couldn't he
think of what was happening back home while he was away? Didn't he
understand people were worrying over him? And at least Brian really
wanted to know why he actually left. Was it because of the fight with
him, or the fight with Veronica? Or was it the pressure, couldn't he
handle it anymore? Why hadn't he looked for help? There were enough
people around him who could help him, who even would love to help
him, Brian would anyway. As soon John had arrived home he had to
answer a lot of questions.
Freddie was the last called by Jim. Phoebe, Freddie's personal
assistant Peter Freestone, had picked up the phone. Patiently he
listened to what Jim had to tell him and finally went to search for
Freddie. Freddie was delighted to hear the good news. Phoebe knew
Freddie always liked John very much, although they lived in two
different worlds. Phoebe even expected Freddie to be delighted but
just not that much. Possibly John meant more to Freddie than he
showed everybody. Freddie was very protective over John, but always
told everybody that was the way the band worked. They were always
very protective over each other and they were a real band. Every
bandmember was equal and every bandmember had his own tasks within
the band. That was true, but maybe Freddie was a little bit more
protective over John than over Brian or Roger. Freddie always had
very much respect for Brian's musicianship, Roger was Freddie's fun
making pal and John was just John. Always very quiet, but he always
seemed so strong, that was something Freddie admired of John, his
strong way to be the way he was, John wasn't afraid of being himself.
Phoebe knew Freddie like that very much. Maybe Freddie was that
protective over John because he was the youngest and came in later.
John had to fight to put up with the others. Freddie and Brian were
both writing very much and their songs were quite strong. Roger was
the enthusiastic power and he had his dreams that kept him strong.
And the fact Freddie, Brian and Roger were one year together already
and had had a few other bassplayers before John made that John always
felt like an outsider. The others knew that and they helped John to
put up with the band, but he had to work really hard to keep up the
standard. John did it good, he actually did it real good.
Phoebe knew Brian felt guilty over John leaving, but he wasn't sure
Freddie felt guilty. He knew Freddie had made his way to the house of
the Deacon's to talk with Veronica, when he came back home he was
quite glad. Phoebe had asked him what they had talked about but
Freddie never answered that question. What had happened, Phoebe
didn't know, but it was alright.
* * *
Veronica was longing for a normal family life again. She missed her
children and she missed her husband. She was so glad everything would
be normal again in two days. The good news of John coming back home
made her strong again and she started, with the help from her mother-
in-law, to clean the house. That work made she could take her
thoughts away for a moment from the hard and sad situation. Life was
great again. Veronica didn't dare to think of what was coming when
John was back home. She knew a lot had to happen, a lot had to be
talked through before they could start living their quiet life again,
she was afraid for that, for another crisis. Veronica tried hard not
to think of that, later there was enough time to think and to talk.
John's mother Molly thought of things she had to say and to ask her
son. John had a lot to explain when he came back home.
The two women cleaned up the house, glad everything was turning to
normal again. When they finished work they smiled at each other,
knowing exactly what the other meant and felt. For both of them, one
thing was really clear, the whole situation brought them together and
now they were as close as they never had been before. They always
liked each other very much and they respected each other, but now
they even fully understood each other. Both were two worried women
who had to take care of the children they loved and Molly knew how
Veronica must have felt when John was suddenly away. Molly was even
more convinced of Veronica's strong personality and that Veronica was
able to stand the worst situation. She admired how Veronica had taken
decisions in this rough time and how she had found solutions of a few
problems. She was sure John had married the right woman. A woman with
a warm heart, and the strength of man. Molly was sure Veronica was
able to survive better then some of the men she knew, strong men, but
not in life. Molly was most of all very grateful Veronica took care
of John, cause she did and she did it splendid.
Molly and Veronica sat down to drink a cup of tea and to talk.
Finally they could talk about normal things again. The news of John
coming back home had relieved them. For several weeks you could feel
the tension inside the house, now it was gone, washed away with one phonecall and the cleaningfoam. And both Molly and Veronica were longing for the day after tomorrow, when John was back home again.
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